Rules of Engagement

Greetings Everyone,

I hope all is well. I want to discuss something today that I feel is important. We are facing so many issues today that challenge the way we as people interact. I am not just referring to the aftermath of COVID-19 (coronavirus). With the “Me Too Movement,” people should be more cautious about how they approach people. Here is my story…

Recently, one of my friends told me his friend is interested in me and he would like to get to know me. Since this person is a friend of my close friend, I politely declined. I am not actively dating right now because I am focused on healing and getting myself together. I work a lot and I don’t really have adequate free time for dating, which most men want. My friend knows this; however he doesn’t know if I were really interested in dating, it would be him. We eluded to it. I don’t think he and I will ever date. I am just happy being his friend.

I was given the name and number of his friend, which I saved to my phone. However, I never called him or intended to. I have heard this man in the background while I was talking on the phone with my friend more than once, which instantly turned me off. He was insistent that I talk to him. The most recent time was a couple of days ago… I was told the man said hi. I said hi. He proceeded to ask me why I never called him. He also told me he has been trying to talk to me for nine months. In my mind, I was thinking he a lot of nerve and audacity. I do not like to be questioned. I do not handle it well. I am vocal about that. Yes, I am an open book, but this dude doesn’t know me from Adam. He further said that he sent me a friend request, which he wanted me to accept. He did not send me a request. I did have friend requests, but none were from him. I probably wouldn’t have accepted it any way. My friend had another call and had to go.

Later that day, my friend called me back and it was the same siutation. This time, the person told me he wanted to date me and he wouldn’t hurt me and so forth. He and my friend were arguing because the dude assumed my friend poisoned my view of him. No, my friend did not taint my view of this man in any way. I was turned off by his insistance. My friend had already told this person that I was not interested. I have repeatedly asked my friend what he told this guy about me for him to come off so hard. He claims his friend knew about my plight at my full-time job. Additionally, the guy overheard me speak, which he thought I was intelligent. I might be wrong, but I think my friend mentioned this person is a bit of a womanizer. Either way, it was my decision to not interact with him. I hung up the phone because I was so angry about the exchange. I told him directly that I was not interested in getting to know him, which seemed to really set him off.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind meeting people and going out. Just understand that I am extremely guarded after my last relationship and from dealing with people I met afterwards. I am damaged. I am not too trusting of people on their intentions. Unfortunately, I have been through a lot and I don’t want to be mistreated. Yes, I know everyone won’t use and mistreat me like people from my past did. Let me explain this: I am a highly intuitive person. The more I discover myself, the more I feed off of the vibes I receive from others. I am also introverted, which means I am selected in terms of who I gravitate towards. Based on my experiences, my tolerance and patience level is dwindling. I explained to my friend that I did not like the way his friend not only approached me but how he questioned and insisted after I declined. I further told my friend that people ned to come at me correct since I am not like most people.

Here is the purpose of my post: too often, people try to force themselves on other people. I am not referring solely to rape. I mean they try to push themselves on other people, even after they are rejected. I have even heard stories of people being killed when they reject or decline a person’s advances. That scares me. People need to understand when rejection happens for any reason, it is a part of life. Do not question it. I cannot speak for anyone but myself, but I find it to be reprehensible. We all have our beliefs and personalities. However, with the “Me Too Movement” and rape culture, I think people need to chill out on insisting a person talk to them. These are the rules of engagement.

Please let me know what you think. I can be reached via email at emailrayneelise@yhoo.com. Thank you for your time and continued support. Enjoy your day. Be blessed.

❤ Rayne Elise ❤